AWKRD Radio, who's this?

I have recently become a legend on local radio.

(note: I'm not telling you guys my real name, just in case you know me.)

I rung a local radio station (they ask you to ring and vote between two songs and one caller wins a prize) and when the DJ asked my name, I replied. His answer? "That's my favourite female name." Oh yeah? "Yeah, because all girls I've met with that name have been hot. Are you hot?"

Mentally, I rolled my eyes. Here it comes.

At any rate, I didn't win the tickets that night, but I tried again the next night, only to be greeted joyously. "Is this hot (my name here)?!" Yep, that's me.

My boss and my friend's sister both heard this exchange. I walked into work as my boss yelled "I heard you on the radio!!!" Facepalm.

And here's where it starts to get insanely bizarre, and an accurate portrayal of my life.

The next time I called (they were giving away a free CD of your choice) he asked me what my favourite male name was. I responded that I had a few, and he goes "Wow. You're loose." And that was where he cut off the clip on the air. Now I'm loose. Excellent.

Then I met the guy at a music festival the radio station sponsored, and we took a few pictures together, which became my Facebook profile picture. When I came up to him and said "I'm Hot ___!" he goes "YEAH you are!!" Fabulous.

Five seconds after the picture goes up, my friend comments it. That's her old neighbour. Of course it is.

I Facebook friend the guy, and he comments my picture too, saying something to the effect of "hellz yeah!!"

I just called in again to win a CD tonight, and the DJ shot the shit with me for a bit. He was all amped that we were Facebook friends, and then, during our little chitchat, he said "Tell me something I don't know." And I said "I think you used to be my friend's neighbour." He told me he was, and then this happened:

"Yeah, it was awkward because her window was right next to my bedroom window."

"Did you used to smoke pot? Because we could smell it in her room."

"Shut your front door."

"That's what you get for calling me loose."

He went on to describe how he did "smoke the left handed cigarette," and tell me to send his love to my friend and her family, because he missed them.

This sort of thing happens to me all the time, mates. All the time. 

Let's add "radio fame" and "weed chats with DJ's" to the list of things I have accomplished in my life.

(ps. I didn't win.)